Historian: We Never Had Wars Over Cutlery

Albert Frank is a professor at Greyhound University.
Tea party movement. -We have had wars over money and territory, but never cutlery... we should drink more tea, says historian Albert Frank. Lots of tea, and coffee too. Anything that takes our mind of fighting.

Albert argues that if you serve coffee to price fighters when they enter the ring, people will no longer be willing to pay. -I don`t think people want to see two men sit in a ring drinking coffee. It`s not what they paid for.

He think the same logic applies to warfare. -If you invade another country armed with tea, the locals will laugh at you. Imagine a suicide drinker trying to explode himself. People will crack up.

The historian points out that armies have to rethink their approach to the navy. -Tea torpedoes virtually have no effect. It disarms itself automatically after launch.

The air force too has to reassess their means. -Dropping a tons of coffee on top of cities will only make people angry. It`s like having a bird shit at your clothes. It`s not the right approach to win hearts and minds. I suggest they drop instant coffee or tea bags and let the people down there mix in the water themselves.

-The whole idea of air bombing is ridiculous. Earth has it own drop system. Everything that needs to be dropped is dropped by mother earth. It`s called clouds, I don`t see the reason why we should add anything to that. It`s perfect the way it is.

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