Hurricane Apologises for Not Aiming At The White House

-What's the point? They already have one. Having said that, I like to take this opportunity to let you all know, it's not one of us. We're not political animals, we don't take sides, we just destroy.

-Again, I can not stress this enough, I know it's looks like a typhoon, but it's not, it's a tycoon. We have nothing to do with the climate changes inside the White House, says the hurricane in an old fashioned printed press release spread by the wind.

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Al "Jesus" Franken Is Back!

Trumps worst nightmare, Al Franken, is back after more than 3 days. In a time when everything goes faster, the resurrection was weirdly slow. Even real Jesus would have gone back and fourth to heaven 50 times in that time. So why?

-Truth, fairness and logic thinking works slow on a mass scale, but thats not why I waited so long, I've been very busy, I'm lodestar. I put on a ponytail, a butler dress and sneaked in to the White House and served everybody White Russian while I cleaned Trumps desk for adult information, says Al Franken.

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Shadow President Runs USA

A group of anti-Trumps has taken control over the White House and is currently running Washington.

The rebeliĆ³n was revealed today, but has in fact been operative for some time - to avoid total inanition. -We found it necessary to inform the public that there is another President in the room, he's "armed & dangerous", in this situation that is a good thing so please stay calm until the next election.

-We got this under control, says anonymous source.

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Most Humans Still Alive Half Way Through Trumps Presidency

-Humanity will survie Trump, says Ali Baba junior, he got less than 2 years left, there's not enough time to kill 7 billion people. ...