Hurricane Obama

Force of nature. Nothing can stop this man. A war, a finance crisis, an oil spill... -Bring it on, says the president as he speaks to American auto worker, and I`ll take you down like a little bitch!

Foto by Sister72

Chinese workers wants a piece of the rice

Hammertime! Chinese factory salaries are 17% since last year. -In 30 years Americans will be making our shit, says Union leader "Ping Pong". -And we`re gonna pay them in Mexican money. Now that`s pay back!

Photo  openDemocracy

-I`m looking forward to spend more time with my hookers.

Leaves the world stage. Ex Chief Executive Tony Hayward says he`s really tired of the media circus. -The war is in Afghanistan, not America.  Maybe that`s why your all so eager to punish me, cause you haven`t catched bin Laden. Compensation for something are we, fucking yankees.

Photo World Economic Forum 

100 million dollar man

Joins the club. BP Chief Executive Tony Hayward get a gigant bonus for his efforts in bringing oil to the American people. -We unwillingly tried a new IKEA model on the coast of Florida where people could get the basics and assemble the petrol at home. It didn`t work. However, we would like to thank Tony Hayward who despite the oil leak, managed to deliver it to America in desperate times. Much like the Norwegian sailors who defied the Natzis and supplied Britan with oil during WW2.

Foto: Yahoo! News

Dumb throat

The source. The retarded intelligence officer, among friends called Steve Hawkins, apologizes for the leak and says he lost faith in the war on terror. -Weapons aren`t working. I saw no other way to ending this mess than an information attack. As they say, the internet is mightier than the sword...

Foto j. botter

Leakipedia

Flooding. Wikileaks is litterly drowning the army with facts. The internet carpet bombing has froozen warmongers in silent shocks as their revealed one by one on the information highway. WMA suggests Julian Assange, the mother of whistleblowing, gets himself a Vuvuzela, cause flute is just not gonna do it anymore.

Logo by Wikileaks

Blography

Look at me. The world`s first blography hits the internet these days. The old fashioned books made by dead trees became to complicated for the writer since he is still alive and will live for another 70 years pluss. Last chapter is far from written and the author found it complicated constantly having to recall the sold books for updates. Instead, read the biography live online as life unfolds. Ladies and internet nerds... Blography!

Illustration Gideon Burton

You don`t have the copyright on a tough background

Cry babies. Only 13 % of USA population are African Americans and they make too much noise. 70 % is European Americans and they newer complain. Being a slave in the 1800s wasn`t that different from having a job. They worked 12 hour days, 6 days a week too - and the pay was shit. And some of the land owners where blacks. And even they had fucking slaves so stop yawning. Everybody had a hard time.

Illustration jmcauser

Horny planet

Unemployment. Greeks spends after the finance crisis, in average, 40 hours more on lovemaking every week. The jobless men has quickly become the hottest holiday attraction for young women around the world. A local beach lion sums it up: -I`ll newer be able to work again.

Foto jaybergesen

-I still got it!

Threatens to blow up America. -This is not the time or place to fuck with us. We need the troops in Afghanistan. So we`ll just nuke him. It`s gonna be a lot of flied rice, laughs US Secretary of War.

Photo Wikimedia Commons 

-I should have walked for president

Why he lost. Looking back at he election race John McCain admits, yes, I should have walked. Running at my age was dumb. And picking Sarah Palin?! What can I say. I`m a horn dog.

McCains nurse says he will not run for president in 2012, but he might drive.

Foto marcn

Chinese fake away


Faked in China. Nothing is more bullshit than friendly China helping the world and wanting nothing in return. China Today spews out this one party journalism all over the world. They lent the design from Time Magazine and translated it to English hoping it will win our hearts and minds.

World Mess Association has taken the liberty to publish everything China Today left out in special edition we like to call  China Today Tomorrow Yesterday.

Foto Cain and Todd Benson

Weboholics Anonymous

Kicking one for the other. Surfomania is the new hot addiction among psychologists. So many suffer from this that AA actually loose money. -Nobody cares about alcohol anymore, so we have to keep up with developments and keep our mouth where the money is. Thats why we introduce Weboholics Anonymous. It`s like a fast food version of the good old AA. Lighter, faster & cheaper - works out good for both parts:)

Foto mac_ivan

Islam wants you

Mumbo jumbo. The US Army wants you, Islam wants you. They both need help, but for different things... 


Promise more leaking

Bigger is better. Even though BP managed to stop the oil leak today they guarantee it`s only temporary.  -"We will leak again, probably within a few hours", says BP spokeshole.

Foto Michael (mx5tx)

Haiti must not forget USA

Disaster lovers. 6 months ago Haiti promised the world they would help America rebuild their country on a more solid ground after it fell apart by lies. Like so many others, they have failed to keep their promise on a massive scale. Everyone but this guy, who is still going for it.         Foto dcJohn

Visa dating

Yeah! Internet has redefined the way old western horndogs meet, date and buy younger women, but it`s not only men who find partners with a 50 year age difference attractive. Check out these colorful dating profiles
Photo by beesparkle

Polanski free to have a go at underage girls

What? SAMBLA (Swiss American Man Boy Love Association) issued today an anti USA visa to the 76 year old french sex machine and escape artist.

Photo by Jacob Freeze

Did you mean...

GN#ZKJA. Noone has helped dyslectics more with spelling than google. And noone have made people care less about spelling than google. Even people who can spell use google to check their spelling, cause they don`t care anymore...

Image google 

Economic dictionary

Sabotage. World mess association is proud to present a new set of words to describe the current state of economics. Without further ado, here is economic dictionary.

Photo by AMagill

Dirty ways to find work in Europe

Fuck! Job hunting in the former Eastern Europe is a bitch. Here`s a helping guide for the desperate generation. Enjoy!

(Ps! This joke was written by professional comedy writers. Please don`t try this at home).

Photo Jayel Aheram

Most Humans Still Alive Half Way Through Trumps Presidency

-Humanity will survie Trump, says Ali Baba junior, he got less than 2 years left, there's not enough time to kill 7 billion people. ...