Bono Offered The Pope Gig: -Not In A Million Years

Bono: -I got to go. There must be a rock gig somewhere.

Centre stage. -I`ll do it, Al Gore cuts in. I need that position. I need that platform. !!!!! It`s my last shot at global dominance. Global warning didn`t work as I intended. Religion is a much better place to scare people into doing as I say.

-I`ve tried politics. I nearly made it. I tried scary monster movie, got me a Nobel Peace price, nearly made it... I`m sick of not making it. I need a victory.

-I`m getting old. Look, I lost weight like Clinton. I can do this. Give me a shot. Please?

-For the love of God, notice my hair. Who at my age has real awesome hair? No one, except me! Hire me.

Photo World Economic Forum