-If you got basic cable subscription, there`s no way in hell you`re gonna find your way into a gym, says agent Stupid in Food Bureau of Insanity. If you got internet, you want even leave the house. Possibly your bedroom.
-We have people on our program that we haven`t even signed on. All the wannabe Lazicans in Europe, Asia, Africa and not South or Latin America - still too much grunch. It`s hard to realize it was better than communism... - anyway, where was I...
-Fitness centres all over the world is fighting back with their own weapon: TV. It`s designed to make people not notice that their actually woking out. -So far we have fooled millions into moving their fat asses while watching tv. It`s when the commercials come on they notice the kitchen is not just around the corner for a snack. Thats when we hit them in the head with a baton.
-Then we carry them out the back door and make burgers out of them. Then we eat them to learn them a lesson. When we finally shit them out again after spending 1-2 days in our stomach they know not to go for a snack. If fact, if I hear any talk of snacktime I punch them straight down. Yeah! Try to eat with that mouth. We`ll see how well you chew without teeth.
Photo JohnE777
