Stormtrooper Comes Forward: Darth Vader Groped Me

-It happened during inspection before we attacked the Rebel Force. It was a surprise attack and the groping really surprised me. I wasn't prepared for it and I didn't know how to handle it. So I just stood there and took it, says the Stormtrooper.

-It's the most humiliating experience in my life as a stormtrooper. I'd much rather die on the battlefield than have Darth Vaders rub my balls. It was just weird.

-After the incident he'd invited me to his lair and he'll come out of the shower all nude and ask me to sing a song while he pied in the fish tank. The guy is nuts.

-It was when I realised that coming forward won't change anything that I decided to do it. I'll die anyway. So what the heck. Lets do it.


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