Five Reasons To Buy Toyota

1. Blame the speed tickets on the recall.
2. Blame everything on the recall.
3. A bad Toyota is still better than a good European.
4. It`s not American, I mean Mexican...
5. One more sale for Toyota is one vote less for China.

Atomics Anonymous

Is an Iranian oppositional aid society describing itself as a fellowship of secular world citizens with a desire to stop bombing.

AA launched the nuclear twelve-step program in Iran to recovery from delution, supression and other religious problems. At the moment nobody knows excatly where they are in the process. As with every addiction, it has it setbacks. According to the International Atomic Energy Agency (IKEA) it`s gonna be a tough recovery. "Nobody quit heroin easy, it takes strong will and one must be prepared to experience difficult withdrawal symptoms. Iran doesn`t seem to have any of those qualifications - this is gonna take some time...".

Road Map for War

WMA is seriously worried about the peace development in the Middle East. "There hasn`t been any confrontations in months. it`s about fucking time we blow up something!" says warpromoter and head of WMA. "I got tonns of stock in the world finest weapon factories and I need a fucking conflict!!! If the Arabs settle down I`ll go bankrupt. I need a war, now. Anybody? I can`t just invade a country without an excuse?! Come on, throw me a freeking bone here, a terrorist, anything!"

Ukraine`s Hair Minister

Ministry of Hair

After she lost the election, the people outside Ukraine, asked themself if Yulia Tymoshenko would have had any time left to run the country after doing her hair. "No," says a paid hairdressed from the Viktor Yanukovych party. "There`s no way. After spending 7-8 hours in hair and make up every morning, there wouldn`t be much time left for anything but photo ups. That`s why Viktor Yanukovych is so suited for the presidency. Cause he`s fucking ugly. And he knows that. He also understands that there is nothing he can do about it, so we`re not afraid he`ll waste time in the mirror. Who would wanna spend time looking at that?!".

Norway Beats China

Norway beats China down in their pants in the Olympics. Only two years after ruuling the world in their own MaOlympics. The arrogant powernation doesn`t have a chance against little Norway with their 5 million inhabitants. If China want to come up to a Norwegian level, they have to increase their population with 870 billion people. They need thousand billion chinese to choose from in order to find talents who can match the Norwegians. China is just so fucking pathetic next to Norway, not even Dalai Lama manages to humiliate the communist party at that level.

Vancouver Weird Olympics

The number of weird diciplines in the Vancouver Olympic Games is outnumbering the recognized sports. TV viewer around the world ask themselfes "What the hell is that?".

Iran`s Manipulation Program

Iran officially acclaimed that they are now capable of producing atom bombs. The atom for war program was started after the Iranian revolution in 1979 to scare Israel and the rest of the whole world into converting to Islam. Either you follow the profet or we blow up the world. Weither or not they will use the nuclear bombs on the demonstrators in Iran is as unpredictable as the maniacs in charge.

Valentine's Mail

Valentine`s day is an annual holyday in which lovers express their love for each other by sending mass-produced emails known as "Valentines mail". The Islamic version, Palestine`s day, is an weekly holy day where Muslims express their love for Muhammad by sending mass-produced suicide bombers into Israel known as "Palestines mail".

Bush Resurrection

Not only are Haiti in desperate need of recovery, but so is also former US President George Bush`s reputation. One could argue that if there is one person who should stay away from Haiti, it`s George W. Bush. Looking closer he seems like the right guy, at the right place, at the right time. Haiti is a great place for change.

More info, press Clinton Bush Haiti Fund

How To Draw Muhammad

World Mess Association went to Denmark to find out how the Muhammad cartonists drew Muhammad. The answear was so easy it was shocking to us, considering how much conflict they created. To draw Muhammad you need two things: pen and paper. Take the pen in your hand and start drawing. It is entirly up to you what the outcome will be. WMA finds it difficult to understand that such an harmless act could make millions of people go nuts in the street and burn down embassies that has no relations what so ever with the person who drew it, the people who printed them or the millions of people who laughted their ass of the whole thing.