Trumps True Identity Revealed When Receiving Oxygen Through His Breathing Mask

As if getting your President infected with covid-19 wasn't enough, America was hit with another shock when his true identity leaked. The treatment made it impossible to keep it a secret. Trump has been on oxygen his whole life. He is Darth Vader.

-This explains everything, says a White House journalist. Now at least we know...

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Bank Robbers Take to Face Masks

 

-It brings back the feeling of the good old days, even though I do most my steeling online these days, it's all very nostalgic to me, says Antonio Cho, who's robbed God knows many innocent people. 

-I spread fear, it comes with the job, but at least I don't have to feel guilty about passing on a deadly virus. That would be an insult. What I do causes enough harm as it is.

-As a bank robber I understand the virus, the motiv is not to kill, its a side effect. The goal is to grow, get rich, bigger, have more... death and destruction is just a necessary byproduct to reach that goal. If I could do it without I would. 

-But I can't. And that's where you and I have differ.

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